Home Page

Little bowden primary school‘Working together to love learning’

  • Search
  • Translate


All English work can be completed in your English books - please ensure you are keeping the standard high by joining your writing and presenting your work neatly. Just as you would in school.



Re-watch the battle scene again.

Today I would like you write a paragraph to describe the battle scene.

You should try to include lots of interesting verbs to describe the actions of the warriors and the mysterious black creature.

You could also recap your previous learning on expanded noun phrases.

I have attached the video link below.


Punctuating speech - video linked at the bottom and guidance for punctuating speech.

Today I would like you to have a go at writing a section of speech for the first part of the video. 

They could be father and son. What could they be saying to one another?


When using speech in year 6, we want to make sure the speech is relevant and important. Speech should be purposeful, it should move the story on or be used help us to understand the personality of the character. We can do this by selecting synonyms for said more carefully. Is the character loud and confident or quiet and shy?


We want to come away from the small talk for example:

"Hi Dad," said Bobby "How are you this morning?"

"I am very well, thank you son. How are you doing?" smiled Dad.

This isn't adding to my story or moving the action on, therefore it is not necessary to my writing.


Panic stricken, Bobby bellowed, "Dad! Dad! Dad! Quick, come quick," 

Stood still, staring at the empty space, where the precious sacrifice to the gods once stood.

Dazed, his Dad shook him as he to witnessed the empty alter.

"Son, you know what you must do..." he calmly whispered, in hope that the rest of town would not hear.


The example above moves the action of the story on, its tells the reader that something is wrong, the reader knows that the son has got something to do. It gives a clue for the journey. It shows that the Dad is quite a calm and collected character, unlike his son, who panics. Speech and narrative are inter-twined to engage the reader.



INDEPENDENT WRITING - no support from adults, you may use use peers though, writing should be done by hand in your book (not on a computer). 

I would now like you to have a go at writing the story to go with the video. Or you could think of it as what words would go with the story. The work you have completed over the last week should help you to do this.

You should have words banks to support the description, ideas on how to describe the different scenes, and an understanding of how to include speech.


I would suggest that you do a a little bit each day starting today. That is three lessons to complete your story. Try to include some revision and editing time in each day. Just like we would usually in class.


You have made a start at writing the first part of your story.

Before you continue writing, spend some time proof-reading your work, revising and editing. You could even do some shared revising and editing with another member of the class, read your work to one another. Your friend might spot mistakes that you've missed or maybe have some ideas for making it better. Use the list below to support.


1. Have you included a range of adverbials (adverbials tell us how when or where something has happened)

2. Underline the first word of every sentence. Have you over used any words? Have you got interesting sentence starters?

3. Colour in your expanded noun phrases. If there aren't any you know you need to include some.

4. Have you included speech? Does it move the action on or give your reader clues about the character? Is it punctuated properly?

5. Verbs - colour in the verbs to show the actions. Are they interesting, do they enhance the action? Are they year 6 level?


Continue with your story writing.


Final day of writing, today you need to complete your story. Begin in the same way you did yesterday. Proof-read, revise and edit. Then continue with your writing. You might share the final piece with friends and family. I will look forward reading your stories on Monday.